Akashic Record Reading with Energy Healing
2015-09-16
Um wow, I just had a healing session with my Mama, led by Reverend Zarchian Amjoy, and we had both of our Akashic Records opened. I used to really believe in that stuff, but this time I've changed and saw the Akashic Record opening not as literal, but as a means to help me understand what the hell has been going on unconsciously! I didn't realize that I haven't been expressing my true feelings because I felt judged negatively and unloved and that I was going to be in trouble. Well, after this healing session, I've been given the tools to help myself express my emotions and feelings with only the validation of myself needed. Aho! So, here we go: I FEEL...physically drained and extremely sore and broken from taking care of 2 heavy twins {haha, mama has excellent milk!} I FEEL emotionally numb from pushing my emotions aside to help others because of my hatred for witnessing people upset. I hate getting angry and I don't like crying myself. I try to keep things light, but by doing that, I've made things very heavy hearted by not being honest! I FEEL unloved and not cared for by people that I call my "friends" and "family". Friends and family that I've repeatedly asked to come over to my house and visit me and my twins and support me in this new wild ride of Motherhood - in any way they can - even if it's a short amount of time - even if it's just a phone call of, "How are you sugar? Do you need anything?". I FEEL SO IN LOVE with my twin girls Satori & Reymi - I've never known a LOVE like this! I FEEL scared to co-parent with the twins' father. I FEEL scared to possibly share a home with him so that we can raise the twins together. I FEEL scared that I will continue to hurt him - and I never mean to! I know I'm a force to be reckoned with, I've got a laundry list of men who'd agree, but thank GOD/GODDESS there's at least 2 people in this world that truly know how dorky and sweet and mushy inside I really am, and that's my BEST FRIENDS Carol Miranda and My-Cherie Haley! Too bad I'm not a lesbian!!! Lastly, I FEEL embarrassed to be writing all these words where 543 of my peers can see my vulnerability. Thank you for witnessing my feelings coming out in a public place. Aho, Namaste, Peace in Greece, and eat yo' peas.